Super short post. Haven’t decided on a schedule yet, but I’ll probably try and post once a day for the remainder of the month.
Someone in front of me says something and I jump slightly, shake my thoughts from my head, look around in confusion. The woman is standing in front of me, a smirk on her face, her arms crossed. She looks confident, triumphant. She must have said something she’s very proud of. There’s only one way to respond such a situation.
Behind my sunglasses I blink stupidly. “I’m sorry. What was that?”
The woman’s eyebrows rise up. She must be rolling her eyes at me. Understandably so. Her shoulders rise up, she takes the sort of breath that isn’t so much as sigh as it is a sharp inhale of exasperation and says, “You said you weren’t rich, and I said you were kind of a downer, and then you just agreed with me. So I said, ‘Wow, you’re not even rich in spirit, huh?’” After the briefest moment of silence, a ceremonial pause in which I could have begun a rebuttal (and likely been talked over) she smiles and says, “I’m pretty funny” in a voice of feigned innocence.
I say nothing. I bend over, reach down, pick my coconut up off the ground and hold it before me like it’s a snifter full of brandy and not an overgrown seed full of rotgut rum, “Wow,” I say, my expression neutral, my voice without even a hint of malice. “I’m glad I didn’t bother to pay attention to that.”